It happens to us all. Unexpected turns lead into one way streets. Just when you think you’re going in one direction, the universe offers a clip round the ear that sends you hurtling in another.
Dusting yourself off to start all over again, is a leap of faith. It says that you know there must be better things waiting ahead. It’s your response to the universe, saying ‘I’m not done yet.’
Yet whether it’s finding a new job or a new partner (or even getting back into writing a newsletter), our fear always is of rejection. What if no-one wants me, or what I have to offer? While friends recite our talents in reassuring tones, we wallow in the pond of not-good-enough.
But there’s a more effective way to deal with the fear of rejection. An antidote that moves you from a crippling, inward obsession, to a more useful and productive, outward focus.
The antidote to the fear of rejection is to serve. As with all paradoxes, it seems counter-intuitive to serve the very people that you fear will reject you. But serving has a different mindset. Your focus is on their needs, not yours. It’s on their hopes, instead of your fears.
To serve is a conscious choice that, by default, improves your life too. Offered with good intent, your energy is channeled into making other’s lives better. Truly serving means that you are offering your best. And because it’s impossible to look in two directions at once, your self-talk changes to words of encouragement and belief, because that’s what you are giving. Magic!